Yesterday was a whirlwind of emotion for me. I don’t want to get into specifics until all the legal stuff is behind me which I pray and hope it is soon but the day’s events put many many things into perspective for me.
Most specifically how incredibly different my husband and I react to situations- and why I believe it is our differences that actually help us continue to stay married.
#1 My husband is an analyzer and I’m IMPULSIVE. He likes to think things out- he doesn’t act until he’s sure whereas I’m impulsive and act on my emotion. While he can sometimes take what feels like an eternity to make a decision on something as basic as the waitress asking him what kind of beer he wants- it is precisely that decisive nature that keeps me from selling the house and moving to a pot farm upstate.
#2. My husband takes NOTHING personally and I take EVERYTHING personally. When my daughter has a dream in which she proceeds to tell me that I spent the bulk of it ” freaking out” I feel like a total failure as a mom. Don’t they say that dreams are just your unconscious thoughts coming to life during sleep? And if so, will my daughter be sitting in an analyst’s office lamenting about how much of a shrew her mother was and that is why she can’t hold a job or a steady relationship? Whereas my husband hears this exact same dream- and he just smiles and says that’s funny and talks me off the ledge of shoveling a bag of chocolate chip cookies down my gullet.
#3 My husband will see a pool of pee and just WIPE it up and move on with his day- whereas I will spend hours cleaning and re-cleaning it. Of course there is NOTHING more gratifying than having a bad day and waking up the next morning and entering your kitchen which is a sea of dog pee and poop. Suffice it to say, we keep our 15 year old incontinent Shih Tzu in the kitchen at night because although we take her out before bed she sometimes has these happy accidents. As I step into the pee I feel like SCREAMIN. My husband steps into the pee, pulls off his wet sock and just starts wiping up the floor. He just gets to work. And when he finishes it he is done. And to be honest I am trying to adopt attitude, his good enough attitude about everything. His less than perfect way of seeing the world and existing in it. Of not taking anything too tragically to heart.
Do you think you and your spouse’s differences are what helps to solidify your relationship?