Dates can be incredibly nerve wracking; especially first dates where, essentially, you get only one chance to make a first impression. Agonizing over your hair, your makeup, what to wear that all goes with the territory. But worrying about your appearance is just one component of first date prep.
Once you’ve decided on your look, there’s the issue of mental preparation. There are certain behaviors that are guaranteed to suck all the positive energy out of the room. Need a hint? Don’t fart! And NEVER use a coupon (including that Buy one get one half off coupon you just happen to have for the restaurant you’re going to). Aside from these obvious non-negotiable behaviors, what are some other things you should NEVER do on a first date? With that in mind here are 10 things you should never do and on a first date and why.
#1 Never talk about your ex “ pretty self-explanatory. Talking about the ex tells your date you’re either: (a.) bitter, (b.) still hung up on them or (c.) both.
#2 Don’t talk about religion and politics. Most people have fairly strong opinions on both. On a first date, you really don’t want the conversation to get that heavy. There will be a time for those topics if things progress.
#3 Never talk about your salary or your date’s again, money doesn’t make for good first date fodder. If you’re talking about how much you make, it could be construed as bragging or complaining. Inquiring about how much your date makes just doesn’t create a good first impression.
#4 Never take calls on your cell phone put your phone on vibrate and put it out of sight.
#5 No texting if you’re serious in getting to know this person, they deserve 100% of your attention. In most cases, whatever text you’re receiving doesn’t require a response right that second.
#6 Never expect your date to pay for everything “for many men, it’s a pride thing and they just won’t let their dates pay for anything. That’s fine, but you should always offer. If it’s a first date where you’re just getting to know each other or this is the first time you’ve met in person, it’s not unreasonable for it to be Dutch treat. Whatever you do, do not discuss who’s paying until you’re ready to pay the check.
#7 Never make future date plans during the date again, the first date is a chance to get to know each other. Even if the date is going well, do not commit to a second date during the first date. You owe it to yourself to go home and reflect before taking the next step.
#8 Never bring gifts or accept gifts on the first date yeah, a guy giving flowers on a date is romantic. It’s also a gesture that’s much more fitting after you’ve been seeing somebody. A gift on the first date almost begs the question: is this really you?
#9 Never eat or drink to excess first dates are about first impressions. Stuffing your face or drinking to the point of intoxication does not typically achieve that objective. That doesn’t mean abstention, just moderation.
#10 Never go to the movies on a first date the idea is to get to know each other. Sitting in a dark movie theater doesn’t lend itself well to conversation. Invariably, the only thing you end up talking about is the movie.
So tell me: what are some things you think one should NEVER do on a first date? Do you have any first date horror stories or red-face moments?
All of these plus having sex. Anytime you throw sex into the mix early, ESPECIALLY that early, the waters get completely muddied. Save those super fun shenanigans for later.
It seems like ages since I went on a first date, but I agree with all of these suggestions. Even with new friendships, I tend to keep things basic and casual until I truly get to know a person.
Those are good tips. I like the one about the movie. Seemed like a no-brainer to go to one to me, but you’re right it would just lead to you only talking about the movie. That’s not a good way to get to know someone at all.
You always give the best advice! And I think many of these tips are helpful later down the line too. Put the phones away at dinner people!
It’s been so long since I’ve dated. Some of these are common sense, but you’d be surprised how many people don’t follow her.
Oh these are good points! Movie theater first dates were pretty common when I was young but they don’t make a lot of sense!
Just be yourself on the first date, and go with the flow of the conversation. And pray for non-awkwardness
Haha, I knew religion and politics would be on there! I went to dinner and a movie on the first date with my husband, but after the movie we sat outside for hours just talking.
I have to slightly disagree. One of the best first dates I’ve been on is when we complained about our exes for the first hour. It was pretty funny.
These are definitely some great no-nos that you should not do on a first date! I think that not taking calls or texting are definitely biggies!
I have a friend who always brings up her beliefs right off the bat. She is a strong woman, not pushy, however, she likes to be up front about things that could be expected in the future, if it worked out. I suppose it worked since she got married only after the second guy she dated! I think all these tips are great.
These are all great tips. Especially the no movie on first date. I think a lot of people make that mistake.
These are all so true. It’s important that we focus on getting to know our date and enjoying our time instead of talking to our friends or going online using our phones. I think it’s good to skip the movies as well!
Brilliant ideas! Actually I will never do all of those. Every one should leave a very good first impression on this first date. Uhmm who knows, that first maybe the last lol.
These are great tips. This would be nice to share to young women who are just getting their feet wet in the dating game. I making/taking calls or texting while on a date is very rude. If you can’t keep your hands off your phone, you should have stayed home instead. Just my two cents.
Yesterday i met a sd for the first time he told me he was gonna drop em off i thought they were older and could go off by themselves possibly. I am waiting for him in front of maoz and he comes up and has his 4 kids with him oh my fucking god!!!!!!!!! What a teerible experience!!! They were jumping over the chairs throwing glasses screaming etc. When we began to eat they all set next to him and i felt like i was being surveillanced pressured to watch and take care of kids. I had to leave asap. I was nervous and uncomfortable. Very cute and sweet kids but i am just getting used to meeting sd but your 4 kids?? What the fuck was he thinking to trust me with his kids. I would maybe see him again but if he was so uncareful to leave me with his children maybe its not a good idea. Couldnt talk to him and focus on him without them distracting us. We were supposed to be discussing an arrangement and possibly start after meeting. Weird!!!! My phone is not working so i had to go to the bathroom and ask people for their phones they thought i was weird lololol. I couldnt even use the br because the 2 girls came in and i had to stand outside the door. I could have ran away with them and sold them or some crazy shit. I was so upset because well i have social anxiety (not as bad) and i couldn’t talk right i couldn’t even properly cover my food without dropping it on the floor. I prefer peaceful places and well that place was noisy especially right before christmas. Holy crap!!! What an experience!!!!
With all the openness of contemporary social media, people seem to have forgotten the crucial skill of how to sneak around and meet in dark-lit places where no one can catch you.