I’ve been told that I’m missing that girly gene. The one that makes grown women lust after Louboutins and cash in their kid’s birthday check from grandma for a pair? And when my birthday rolls around and those too cutesy, rose-petal filled commercials with doe-eyed women getting diamond necklaces clasped around their swan-like necks by adoring men dance across TV screens all I can think of is…why am I not more wistful for these things. Why is it that all I really want for my birthday is for my husband to buy me a Carvel cake?!
Is it that being married 18 years, I am beyond the superficial, and the fact that I hardly ever wear the diamond ring and tennis bracelet he bought me- (and believe they might have been better spent funding my kid’s camp tuition) indicative of the fact that I am just a jaded old lady- for whom baubles on birthdays hold little appeal?
Or maybe it’s that I’ve simply grown up and see beyond the commercial scene elaborately constructed by set designers and actors to illicit visceral responses from women, that will tug at their heart strings and have them believing that birthdays and what your love does or doesn’t do, is a litmus test that measures the overall health of your relationship.
Sure, flowers, chocolates, diamond encrusted pendants , rings, bracelets, weekend getaways, feeding each other spoonfuls of Tiramisu- are all wonderful, but they’re just tiny bits of what constitutes a relationship, or at least what I need from a marriage.
The fact that my husband and I have lasted for 18 years, in spite of our 15-year-age gap and our very different personalities– what has held our marriage together is less about he baubles he’s bought me- and more about the fact that he’s up every morning with your kids, giving them breakfast, bringing me coffee and sometimes he’ll EVEN walk the dogs too. Oh yes and he also buys me these Carvel cakes. And he’s the person who I rouse from sleep at 1 am because I need to talk, or that when I feel most discouraged he’ll tell me to keep going.
Maybe having the perspective of many years of marriage under my belt and what it takes to sustain a relationship I immediately look at those gauzy, stylized commercial vignettes for women and their BirthDay and all I can think of is… if my husband remembers to buy me a teeny Carvel cake I’ll feel like my marriage and my life is intact… Am I crazy or just realistic?!
My whole family knows that I ONLY want a Carvel cake on my birthday. You guys have Carvel stores down there, but we get them at the grocery stores here….THANK GOD.
I’m pretty sure you’re just realistic. I love my husband to death, but he will certainly never be considered thoughtful. LOL
I remember Carvel ice cream. It has been a long time since I have had it
I LOVE the cakes from Carvel, but have not had them in years. I need to ask for one when my birthday rolls around this year.
That is nice to ask for the Carvel cake and look forward to it. I would have to add the kind I was hungry for, as well, or I’d end up with something the rest of the family liked. Post a picture of what you get. Delicious ice cream is always a treat. The ice cream shop is not in Nevada anymore, so I will have to make it part of my next vacation destination.
I love ice cream cake and it’s my preferred type of birthday cake. I love the chocolate crunchies on the Carvel cakes.
I think as we experience more in life, the simpler the things we crave for. I don’t really celebrate my birthdays anymore, I just make sure to treat the family with good food and good cake!
I think as we age we want to have less things for our birthday and just try to keep it low key. A cake sounds awesome, a birthday is never complete without one!
I’m not a huge fan of birthday parties unless it’s for the kids or my husband. I don’t mind not celebrating mine and just having lunch or dinner would be fine. I hope you had a good one. It’s great that your husband buys you that cake every year!
We are so much alike. I don’t care much about lavish gifts. I only want a birthday cake on my special day. My husband and my kids know what kind of cake i like and I never grow tired of getting the same kind year after year.
Whenever my birthday draws near, my family always asks me what I want. I don’t like them throwing a party for me. I just want a simple dinner with the family, a little gift (this year I want a headset that fits my ear canal snugly) and of course, a birthday cake. 🙂
Definitely realistic. 😉 I love a good birthday cake and Carvel definitely makes the best.
Those tiny circle Carvel Cakes are life. I like need one for every occasion. They are soo darn good.
The older you become, the more simply you want in your birthday my friend.