New Year’s resolutions my kids asked of me is a sponsored post with pjlibrary.org
Recently amidst my complete meltdown over my kids’ and their behaviors we all sat on the couch and as I was doling out their punishments I decided it was time we had an old-fashioned heart-t0-heart family meeting. That’s right I went into full-on Mike Brady- let’s get to the heart of our dynamics and figure out how to make things better- minus having good old Alice to serve us milk and cookies as we got into the thick of our family’s interpersonal relationships.
After I confiscated all their tech devices I figured I would give them an opportunity to air their grievances in honor of festivus. One thing I’ve learned about parenting is the idea that my kids need to be validated, and as such, treated as individuals with their own sense of self. Their words and their beliefs need to be heard and so I gave them both the floor- to share their truths and ultimately their resolutions for 2020.
New Year’s resolutions my kids asked of me
Me: So kids tell me- how can we make our family better in 2020?
Resolution #1 ( which my son has asked me to do in 2020)– Less Vacuuming.
My son: Well mommy I really wish you would stop vacuuming so much.
Me: I only vacuum because the dogs get their treats all over the place and I hate stepping on the crumbs.
My son: Well mommy I don’t care about the crumbs, but I hate the sound of a vacuum.
( clearly this kid is going to grow up and have an aversion to vacuums an naturally it will be all my fault that he will refuse to vacuum his humble abode)
Resolution #2 (which my daughter has asked me to do) Stop taking so many pictures.
My daughter: Mommy I really think you need to stop taking so many pictures of us.
Me: I think you just don’t like taking pictures and you know what, that is your right, and I am sorry if I force you to pose for me. I just want to capture every moment and save it. I know it sounds silly- but I feel like you are growing up so fast and my way of freezing time is freezing you in those moments. I know I have to respect you and I promise I will take less pictures… of you.
Resolution #3 (which my son asked me to do) Tuck him in at night.
My son: Daddy always tucks me in but maybe you can tuck me in too, if you are not too tired or busy.
(Did I mention this kid has guilt down to a SCIENCE?)
Me: Of course my sweet boy, as long as I can also wear footy pj’s.
Resolution #4 (which my daughter asked me to do) Stop expecting me to get excited like you do.
My daughter: Maybe you don’t see it but I am happy inside. I shouldn’t have to smile all the time. I’m not like you.
Me: I know- you are right, I can’t expect you to act like me. You are your own person and I just need to remember that we don’t express our enthusiasm and happiness the same way.
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The fact that you sat down and validated their concerns and wishes speaks volumes to how much you’re invested in your kid’s feelings. I’d have a hard time with the vacuuming lol. Maybe vacuum while he’s at school? Just a thought!
Doing it for them makes it all the more special. I hope you can do it! They deserve it!
Haha, I take a ton of photos of my kids too. I promised them I’d stop if they asked. If they are in the mood, they are okay with it. But if they say no, I respect it.
I probably don’t vacuum enough. Oops.
I don’t know if I can stop taking pictures, I love the memories, I would like to vacuum less but with three dogs it is almost impossible. Good luck with your resolutions
What a great idea to sit down and have this discussion as a family. I definitely want to do this with my kids. 2020 just started only a few weeks ago so it’s not too late to make resolutions right?
When I ask my daughter what would make life better in our family, she always says the same thing. She wants me to work less. I try to get my work done while she’s in school, but it rarely works out that way.
Nice blog,I love the way your kids are so honest with their opinions. At least you wont have to ask them whats in their mind.
I probably should ask my niece about it too. There are many times we are arguing about some stuff.
I love that they expressed their feelings especially the not getting excited as you do one. My daughter when I spring surprises on her is happy and will smile, but she will not ever be jumping up and down screaming. Oh well. I will say I will never get the vacuuming one because I vacuum when she is not in the house. Although occasionally I liked to pull my mother’s stunt. If we slept into too late for her taste, she would choose that moment to vacuum in our room to wake us up.
My son don’t do resolutions. Your kids’ resolutions are so funny, and how sweet of your son to ask you to tuck him in at night. 🙂
It sounds like they gave you some good feedback. Maybe if you switch to taking more candids instead of posed photos, your daughter won’t mind it as much.
That is quite a list. I decided not to do resolutions but try goals instead. Maybe I’ll stick to them better.
I don’t make New Year’s resolutions. I like have you allowed your kids to give input and that you took their suggestions seriously.
I agree with you that children need to be validated. I give my daughter an opinion because was never allowed to have one. I also explain to her our rules instead of just telling her blindly what to follow because, again, my parents never did that for me and it would have helped me obey better.
I think the excited thing that your daughter noted was a good point. Last year I took my family to Monster Jam because I thought they would enjoy it and we ended up leaving early. Time and energy wasted. It was disappointing. So I no longer just assume that they will enjoy something.
What a great perspective on resolutions…asking your kids want they think you should focus on. Not taking so many pictures would definitely be on my kids’ list. They also hate that I add things to their to-do lists when I see them relaxing. I’m not good at sitting still, but that shouldn’t be their problem.