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Lessons I’ve learned from my Shih Tzus

May 22, 2023 by Melissa Chapman 2 Comments

 Lessons I’ve learned from my Shih Tzus

As I sit here about to type this post, Lessons I’ve learned from my Shih Tzus I realize There are really no words to describe the emptiness I feel on days like today. 

Lessons I've learned from my Shih Tzus

You always think you have time.

So many things left unsaid and so much unresolved stuff. My world is so much grayer without my parents and at times it feels like so much of what has transpired since both their deaths has been tinged with great sadness because neither one of them was there to witness it. If you have loved ones try not to leave anything left unsaid.

This world doesn’t truly allow us to grieve but on days like today my grief is so heavy and so palpable and I just really miss them both and hope if you read this and your parents are still on this earthly crazy planet that you call them today and tell them you love them because i would give ANYTHING for just one more chance to have one more conversation. love you mommy and daddy.

And so it would only be fitting to share this post about my two rescues -Lessons I’ve learned from my Shih Tzus who in so many ways share so many of the qualities I loved and cherished in my parents. 

Lazer has been my constant companion on a daily basis since my dad passed away. And to be fair ( Ike who we rescued five years ago and is Lazer’s forever shadow) is also heavily breathing on my other leg. 

Lessons I've learned from my Shih Tzus

When we adopted Lazer he was two and half and from the day we brought him home he has laid next to me on mornings when getting out of bed felt impossible.

And whenever the opportunity presents itself, he licks my face and tries to get in the nook of my arm or leg, just to be as close to me as he possibly can.

Lessons I've learned from my Shih Tzus

My 12 pound 10 year old Shih Tzu who I named Lazer (yes after my father Z’l whose Hebrew name was Eliezer) is as much a part of the fabric of my life as anything and anyone else.

And not to leave out my Rescue Shih tzu Ike ( who is still very much a puppy) who is also inextricably interwoven into the fabric of my life. We adopted Ike after my mom died. And like my mom he gives so much -he has such enthusiasm and such fierce love and is also very discerning. He keeps his circle very tight! 

Lessons I've learned from my Shih Tzus

Lessons I’ve learned from my Shih Tzus

Lessons I've learned from my Shih Tzus

So why does it seem like I am favoring Lazer? I’m not! It’s just that his life, and especially his old age, feels so parallel to that of my father. And I swear I feel like I see my father’s face in Lazer’s ( And yes–I know it sounds crazy!)

As my father’s illness progressed, he required so much more help but- he was a tough one; fiercely independent and adamant about doing whatever he could, on his own.

Lessons I've learned from my Shih Tzus

Lessons I’ve learned from my Shih Tzus

My Shih Tzus Have Taught me about Determination

Did I mention that Lazer who has problems jumping will attempt a jump from the floor to the couch at least 10 times, until he finally makes it? Like my dad he’s got this spunky quality about him.

And Like my dad, as he has aged Lazer too has slowed down considerably. Yet there are times when he will summon up that puppy exuberance and in those moments he wins my heart all over again.

Lessons I've learned from my Shih Tzus

Sure there are some who think I have gone absolutely mad. I have, in the past couple of years, organized our lives around this little 12 pounder-( and our other rescue Ike who is till very much a puppy at a little over four years old) who I can’t leave in the care of anyone other than my husband.

So yes it’s true I *might have* given up a few trips to exotic locales recently because I couldn’t find suitable accommodations for our boys- but the way I see it- they are my priority.

Lessons I've learned from my Shih Tzus

I feel as strongly responsible and in love with my my dogs as I do my two legged fairly hairless kids. I made a vow when I rescued them years ago that I’d protect and love them.

And sure I don’t relish not being able to jet to Paris, but by the same token these are just small sacrifices compared to the unconditional love they have given me all these years-all the while never asking for anything in return other than just a warm body to snuggle up to. (and we PAMPER them and keep them squeaky clean with PRODUCTS like Rufus & Coco)

Of course some people view my devotion to them as slightly insane, and they wonder, how could I be so utterly connected to an animal?

Lessons I've learned from my Shih Tzus

My Shih Tzus remind me to seek out the essence of other beings

But the thing is, when I look at Lazer all I see is love.  I see his spirit and it is so very reminiscent of the way I felt about my dad. Sure towards the end of his life his body may have betrayed him- but my father’s personality and the very essence of who he was, was still utterly intact.

I see my Lazer in the same way; yes he needs more care now- but his spirit and that love, it’s all still so very present.

I hope in some small way- my kids are gleaning some lessons about life, love and responsibility through the relationship and commitment we honor with our Lazer and Ike and that all life deserves to be honored and cherished.

My Shih Tzus have taught me about how Our time is limited 

I also know my time with both of my rescues is limited. and so each day I spend with them I remind myself is a gift- and of course their love is a gift that continually gives, without any conditions.

Lessons I’ve learned from my Shih Tzus

With all that being said these 10 PET COMMANDMENTS  feel very sacred to me.

1. My life is likely to last 10-15 years. Any separation from you is likely to be painful.

2. Give me time to understand what you want of me.

3. Place your trust in me. It is crucial for my well-being.

4. Don’t be angry with me for long and don’t lock me up as punishment. You have your work, your friends, your entertainment, but I have only you.

5. Talk to me. Even if I don’t understand your words, I do understand your voice when speaking to me.

6. Be aware that however, you treat me, I will never forget it.

7. Before you hit me, before you strike me, remember that I could hurt you, and yet, I choose not to bite you.

8. Before you scold me for being lazy or uncooperative, ask yourself if something might be bothering me. Perhaps I’m not getting the right food, I have been in the sun too long, or my heart might be getting old or weak.

9. Please take care of me when I grow old. You too, will grow old.

10. On the ultimate difficult journey, go with me please. Never say you can’t bear to watch. Don’t make me face this alone. Everything is easier for me if you are there, because I love you so.

Lessons I've learned from my Shih Tzus

When it comes to Lessons I’ve learned from my Shih Tzus … bottom line Life is better with them in it!

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Filed Under: Featured, health and lifestyle Tagged With: dog mama, furbabies, health, health and lifestyle, lessons i learned from my Shih Tzu, lifestyle, Melissa Chapman

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Comments

  1. Cheryl V. says

    May 22, 2023 at 2:27 am

    Your article, Lessons I’ve learned from my Shih tzu’s, touched my heart deeply. You definitely are a mom to two special pups. My husband and I were mom and dad to a Shih tzu/Yorkie mix for twelve wonderful years and sadly lost him to cancer My 5th, 2023. We got him when he was a 6 weeks old and my mom was in hospice for cancer. He and I would stay with my mom in her hospice room and he quickly became a favorite furry face all over the nursing home where she lived those last few months of her life. By 8 weeks old he would stay on mom’s chest and growl at the nurses who brought her medications to her and make all of us laugh at his toughie attitude even though he weighed less than a pound at that point. As he grew, and we came to love his personality and spunk, he trained us how to be his parents. He could be bossy, telling me to go to bed when it was time or I wasn’t feeling well. He always knew. He demanded respect and had my youngest adult son laughing when he came back for a visit and it was necessary that I say to Dickie, “c’mere my VERY good little boy,” before he’d answer my call to take him outside. I forgot to say VERY the first call and he stood stock still till I got it right. He could give me sass (while shaking his cute little head so his ears would fly up and he’d bounce on his front feet) better than any person I ever knew. The bond we formed was unlike any I’d had over my 66 years of owning dogs. There is something so very special about these small furry breeds. My parents are both gone now and Dickie saw me through their losses and my in laws as well. He was he most empathetic little ball of fur and I am so very grateful he was ours to love and cherish for twelve short years. His ashes now rest on a shelf nearby and will be buried with me upon my worldly departure. How could I not take him with me? Thank you again for your wonderful story.

    Reply
  2. Catherine says

    May 26, 2023 at 5:12 pm

    Melissa I can totally relate. We got two pups in 2020. The next year my father got sick and passed a few days before Thanksgiving. Exactly 3 weeks later my mother passed unexpectedly. I am glad they both made it to their early 80’s but I miss them every day. Life sure is different when you are an “orphan”. My pups got me through that difficult time. We don’t go on vacation because we don’t want to leave them anywhere. We moved a few years ago to a home that has 6 acres so we enjoy spending time out on the deck or walking in the woods. I am sorry for your loss and I am sending peaceful vibes to you from Pittsburgh.

    Reply

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