So apparently this movie “Fifty Shades of Grey” has tapped into the mommy porn market in a big way. Just for the record, I hate the phrase mommy porn, but I digress. For those of you living under a rock- aka you haven’t yet read this tantalizing, lustful tale that has women across the country spontaneously combusting from the sheer mention of it, in a nutshell, the book depicts the erotic tale of an innocent college girl and her billionaire boyfriend.
But just what is it about this couple that has women squirming in their seats and blushing uncontrollably? Apparently its power lies in the fantasy it creates and strikes a chord in women readers who secretly relish the opportunity to embody the role of the book’s protagonist, Ana, and her ability to surrender her will to her dominant lover Christian Grey, an elusive and enigmatic bachelor. I think women also appreciate the fact that in the novel, in submitting to her lover, Ana actually finds both love and happiness. ( which to me makes ABSOLUTELY ZERO SENSE, but again I digress).
On the surface this would appear to be just another Harlequin romance- and yet it has taken a hold of the collective feminine psyche in the same way “Twilight” has its pulse on the teen psyche. So my real question is; why is it causing such a stir? And do most women feel like this stir is a good or bad thing for the feminist movement? Or does hyping this sadomasochistic relationship, between this man and woman further the stereotype that most women ultimately just want to be dominated by a man– and it is fine to let all the other accouterments of our hard fought feminism fall away? So in that sense; is this book revolutionary? Do women really want rich, domineering men? Do women have this secret longing to be submissive, because after putting in long hours at the office, getting food on the table– women ultimately just want to have someone take charge, and if that is indeed the case, is this movie more 50 shades of RETRO Grey, does it set women back?
Is our collective fascination with the book based on the fact that deep down inside we all really want to be dominated by men in the bedroom? And if so, what does that say about us? For me – I have no desire to see this movie because those types of sex scenes ( and the thought of engaging in them with my husband) SCARE ME. They are the antithesis of getting me all hot and bothered. But apparently many women are RUNNING – not walking- to the theaters this weekend to catch this flick. Will you be one of them?
Hells no. I wouldn’t even read the book. First, don’t get me wrong… I enjoy a little erotic fiction now and again, but with the multiple horrible reviews of the writing of the book, I want my reading a little more intellectual, I guess.
Fantasizing is great and if domination is your fantasy, great. See the movie. No different than Pretty Woman, I suppose… with kinky sex. It doesn’t scare me, it’s just not my cup of tea and ESPECIALLY I wouldn’t want to watch that in PUBLIC! Weird. I might watch it on BluRay.
I will not. I couldn’t agree more with your take on this freaky phenomenon. I just can’t wait until the hype dies down.
I try to remember that having a fantasy is just that. I know in my own life I have had plenty of fantasies I don’t actually want to become real. I think many women (and men for that matter) might be the same about this. They like the fantasy of domination precisely because it is a fantasy. It’s not their real life.
In some ways it’s the sexualized fantasy version of ‘traditional’ marriage in some religious groups. The woman likes the idea of a ‘traditional’ marriage where she is the supportive, but ultimately submissive, wife to the dominant husband. But when reality hits she doesn’t REALLY want to be submissive and give up her right to be equal in decision making.
It’s also like when we have that foggy remembrance of the ‘good ol’ days’ when life was so simple and pure. The idea being if we give up control it will be so simple. That is true in a fantasy, but in reality it’s not.
I don’t think most women wanting to see this movie really want to have a day to day life where they are subservient and without control. I think it’s just a fantasy. At least I hope so!
Not I, not reading the book or seeing the movie.